Viaads & Ædifyads

It is the nature of all things that all things change. The same is true in The Flip. It’s one of those immutable laws or something. So, while there were naiads and dryads (Still are.) there exist a set of evolutionary changes that have resulted in two new species of hybrid.

I was recently in Detroit where these creatures have had free rein for quite some time. What are they? Much the same way that naiads and dryads are water and wood nymphs respectively, ædifyads and viaads are building and road nymphs. You may be asking why these are only recent developments or why these creatures showed up in the twentieth century rather than when the other nymphs were prevalent. Or you could be asking if I’m going to address the fact that there was no newsletter last week.

Well, unlike times long past, nature still ruled over most of the landscape. It was a big, scary world. But as humans have built and built and built everywhere they could force a building or a road, nymphs were forced to adapt same as other evicted forest creatures.

I met Trivia on I-96. Fresh snow all around and there she was, hitchhiking. Now, normally I don’t pick up hitchhikers, (I’d heard too many horror stories from the eighties) but this girl was nearly gray from the cold.

Turns out she was legitimately gray. Like the color of drying concrete. She introduced herself as Trivia, which is actually a play on some Latin for highway, I can’t speak to that, but she knew an awful lot about the city of Detroit. (Being from Alaska, I did not.)

She told me about how, as the US was being paved, naiads took to the roads, adapting to the environment around them. Because they have shorter lifespans than most humans (naiads live to be about 30 at most) they were able to speed up the evolutionary process. Dryads had a similar experience with the skyscrapers replacing forests. Apparently, the term “urban jungle” came about due to the wild and untamed creatures that moved in after their natural habitats were destroyed. (Or it was racism, 6 of one, you know?)

We had a rather delightful talk about the local hybrids in the area and even learned a few new spots to check out. All in all, it was quite a delightful ride…

Right up until that bitch stole my car. I’m not picking up hitchhikers ever again.

Not to fret, my car was recovered three days later and filled with gravel. From what I gathered about viaads, I think she had an orgy in my car. Gross.